kurt blaine intimacy

The Problem with Kurtofsky

As a ‘shipper, I’m pretty indiscriminate. I have my favorite pairing, but I usually follow good writing and the author I like. Before Dave threatened Kurt’s life and forced a kiss on him, before Blaine, I could read and enjoy the Kurtofsky ‘ship. Even now, I can imagine reading and enjoying story where Dave and Kurt meet ten years on and fall in love when the pain of Dave’s bullying has faded, and Dave truly understands how much he hurt and frightened Kurt.

But one of the things I have been seeing in Kurtofsky fandom is this idea that Karofsky somehow “deserves” a chance with Kurt because he’s such a hurt little woobie and he’s changed. Or at the very least that Kurt should feel bad for rejecting him because Dave is so nice now. I find this attitude pretty disturbing.

I wrote this essay in response to the Kurtofsky/Klaine ship warring I’ve been seeing on Tumblr and also to this story: http://www.scarvesandcoffee.net/viewstory.php?sid=2825&chapter=1

The link above is to a post “Heart” story that resolves the tension between Kurt, Karofsky, and Blaine. While the author expresses Kurt’s anger and his love and definite preference for Blaine, there is a lingering sense Kurt and Blaine should feel bad for Karofsky, so bad that Blaine offers Kurt up to Karofsky for a dance at the Sugar Shack without asking Kurt’s permisison. No. I’m serious. Story excerpt:

Kurt plants a kiss on Blaine’s temple as they begin to sway before nuzzling his face into the crook of Blaine’s neck, just breathing in the scent of him.

A few seconds later, however, Blaine pulls away.


“I think this dance is reserved for someone else,” Blaine says softly, gesturing with his chin toward the door.

When Kurt turns, he’s surprised to see Karofsky standing alone, looking uncharacteristically small and nervous, not knowing what to do with his hands. Blaine waves him over with his hand and Karofsky shuffles over to them, ducking his head.

Kurt looks back to Blaine, shock probably written all over his face.

“Blaine, are you su-”

“Well considering I’m the one who got his number from someone and called him and told him to come here,” Blaine says with an easy smile, “yeah. I’m sure.”

[cut text]
“I’m glad you came back,” Kurt says.

“You are?”

“Of course I am,” Kurt says honestly. “I may not believe you love me, but you think you do. And it’s Valentine’s Day. Everyone should get to have at least one dance with the person they love on Valentine’s Day.”

[cut text]

Unable to stop himself, Kurt takes a step closer and rests his head on David’s chest. He can feel David inhale sharply, but as he exhales, his hold on Kurt’s hand tightens. Kurt allows his eyes to close and he listens to Rachel’s soft, sweet voice come through the speakers as she wraps up the song. They only have less than a minute left to dance, but they’re both sure to make it count.

This story…kind of made me throw up in my mouth a little. Dave may no longer be a self-hating homophobic bully, but he is still self-centered, insecure, and deluded, and he isn’t entitled to anything from Kurt. And Kurt is not a thing that can be passed around from one boy to another.

Dave Karofsky is not a monster, but it is obvious that in the months since he decided he “thinks” he is in love with Kurt he never really thought of Kurt as a person separate from himself at all. He never thought about whether Kurt was attracted to him. He never thought about the fact that he had attacked and humiliated Kurt and threatened to kill him. He never thought about Kurt at all.

We first see evidence of Dave’s objectification of Kurt in the locker room scene where Dave forces a kiss on Kurt. He has just slammed Kurt into a locker, and Kurt chases him down and fights back verbally.

And then Dave forcefully kisses him.

There is absolutely in this scene that would be a lead up to a kiss. Kurt is angry, disgusted, and hurt, but instead of responding to that, Dave just decides to take the kiss he has been wanting. Dave has a scenario in his head that has nothing to do with the enraged man standing in front of him. And even when Kurt reacts with horror, Dave doesn’t seem to notice and actually tries to kiss him again. Dave isn’t reacting to Kurt as a person here. He can’t see Kurt at all or respond to him as a person. Kurt is an object to Dave.
And a year later, Kurt is still an object of desire and an object period, not a person with feelings, who may still be hurt by Dave’s previous actions, a person with a life and a boyfriend that he loves.

To Dave, Kurt is a reward for his current good behavior. He no longer bullies people, he apologized to Kurt, he’s tiptoeing out of the closet, and he sent all these lovely cards. Why can’t Kurt see what a nice guy he is and how much Dave deserves his love? Dave thinks that he has earned the right to Kurt. He has built up a relationship in his head that has nothing to do with the reality of his tenuous would-be relationship with the actual person known as Kurt.

That being said, I do have some sympathy for Karofsky. He is obviously a very frightened and insecure young man who has a long way to go before he feels comfortable with himself, but my sympathy ends where Kurt’s autonomy begins.
kurt blaine intimacy

Mississippi Personhood Amendment

Originally posted by old_blueeyes at Mississippi Personhood Amendment
Originally posted by twbasketcase at Mississippi Personhood Amendment
Originally posted by gabrielleabelle at Mississippi Personhood Amendment
Okay, so I don't usually do this, but this is an issue near and dear to me and this is getting very little no attention in the mainstream media.

Mississippi is voting on November 8th on whether to pass Amendment 26, the "Personhood Amendment". This amendment would grant fertilized eggs and fetuses personhood status.

Putting aside the contentious issue of abortion, this would effectively outlaw birth control and criminalize women who have miscarriages. This is not a good thing.

Jackson Women's Health Organization is the only place women can get abortions in the entire state, and they are trying to launch a grassroots movement against this amendment. This doesn't just apply to Mississippi, though, as Personhood USA, the group that introduced this amendment, is trying to introduce identical amendments in all 50 states.

What's more, in Mississippi, this amendment is expected to pass. It even has Mississippi Democrats, including the Attorney General, Jim Hood, backing it.

The reason I'm posting this here is because I made a meager donation to the Jackson Women's Health Organization this morning, and I received a personal email back hours later - on a Sunday - thanking me and noting that I'm one of the first "outside" people to contribute.

So if you sometimes pass on political action because you figure that enough other people will do something to make a difference, make an exception on this one. My RSS reader is near silent on this amendment. I only found out about it through a feminist blog. The mainstream media is not reporting on it.

If there is ever a time to donate or send a letter in protest, this would be it.

What to do?

- Read up on it. Wake Up, Mississippi is the home of the grassroots effort to fight this amendment. Daily Kos also has a thorough story on it.

- If you can afford it, you can donate at the site's link.

- You can contact the Democratic National Committee to see why more of our representatives aren't speaking out against this.

- Like this Facebook page to help spread awareness.

kurt blaine intimacy

What Kind of Fuckery is This?

Any Kurosky shippers out there? This victim-blaming bullshit was posted to Tumblr and then to LJ. I'm a Klainer *and* and Kurtofsky fan, and I was disgusted.

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To their credit, most of the posters called the OP on her bullshit, but some didn't/

Link to Source: http://lucyjhale.tumblr.com/post/9183552172/hurm
kurt blaine intimacy

A Six Year Old Boy's Glee Crush

“Mommy, they are just like me.”

My oldest son is six years old and in love for the first time. He is in love with Blaine from Glee.

For those who don’t know Blaine is a boy…a gay boy, the boyfriend of one of the main characters, Kurt.

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I know that Glee is mostly a shitshow fail parade, but their positive portrayal of a gay couple is having ripples. Here's a wonderful blog post from a mom whose 6-year-old has a crush on Blaine.

Source: http://getstooobsessed.tumblr.com/tagged/blaine_anderson
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kurt blaine intimacy

Why Fat People Are Afraid to See the Doctor

I was randomly researching internet looking for info on obesity and I found this article, followed by comments by assholes professing to be doctors.

Here's the article:

How obesity is affecting imaging studies

Another way how being obese can hurt you:

“In the past 10 years or so, medicine has become so dependent on imaging,” Uppot said. “Instead of doing very meticulous clinical examinations, a lot of doctors now rely on CT scans, ultrasounds, etcetera, to tell them what’s happening inside the body. What happens when you’re too big to fit on a table? Or you can fit on a table but the image is poor quality?”

And here are the comments:

Anonymous July 25, 2006 at 11:36 am

You must remember though, it is da trying task to do an ordinary physical exam also of these obesitati. Like the X-rays, your hand must push through the monstrous layers of blubber insulating these patient’s intestines from exposure to the cold and the doctor’s probing fingers alike. Try to get a hold of a uterus on a 150- 200 kg (that’
s 300-400 lb) patient, it’s difficult enough during laparotomy not to mention trying to get a hold of what’s inside the uterus.

- And the fatter the patient is, the more likely she is to ask for pictures during ultrasond scan, “could you tell me if it’s a boy or a girl, doctor?”, – when you are trying your best to get the ultrasound waves to penetrate 20 cms of blubber in order to see if there might be a baby in there after all.

4 Anonymous July 25, 2006 at 6:19 pm

Do you guys remember when in residency when you had to put a femoral line in…inevitably it is always on some fat American SOB that has a huge pannus…I would have to get the intern just to lift the panus, sometimes I needed two people, then I would stick the line in fungus-infected skin…I used to feel bad about it but now I know this is how litigious animals should be treated…

5 Anonymous July 25, 2006 at 7:10 pm

I remember when I was an intern and was told by a nurse that she couldn’t put a urethral catheter in an overweight patient. Well, I came up to evaluate the patient, thinking “new nurse, no experience, here I go again…” and found out that this patient was not just overweight, but was massively obese and the nurse was just being nice. I could not even find the penis to put the catheter in. So, I evaluated the patient and realized that he is in urinary retention and really needs this catheter. I paged the resident, who started chewing me out for making such a silly request as to need help to put in a simple Foley catheter and what kind of stupid intern was I, anyway? So grumbling, he walked into the room and his eyes bulged out upon seeing the patient. With both of us pulling and tugging this way and that, we still could not put in the catheter. The resident, red faced, and huffing and puffing at this time, paged the chief resident and requested assistance. The chief resident starting screaming into the phone, yelling at the resident for contacting him for such a stupid request. The poor resident finally convinced the chief resident to come in to evaluate the patient. The chief resident came in and was shocked at the enormity of the patient. With all three of us, tugging/pushing/pulling, we still could not get the catheter in. Finally, the chief resident called the attending who proceeded to chew out the chief resident for such a call. He was finally coaxed to come in (some first born was made in exchange, I think), and once again, a great effort was made to locate the penis to try to place the catheter. During this time, I was trying to explain to the patient what we were doing. The patient finally said with a hint of impatience to the attending – “Hey, doc, did you find it (penis) yet?” To which the exasperated attending replied – “How do you know that you have one?”

John J. Coupal July 25, 2006 at 10:13 pm

Speaking of myocardial perfusion imaging.

When I started in nuclear pharmacy, I remember scanner and gamma camera imaging tables boasting a 300-lb patient weight limit.

Now, they’re designed to support 400+. So they can also be used at the zoo!

These posts are 5 years old, but I'm sure the patients who saw these "healers" felt their contempt deeply.